mental and physical fatigue sets in with subzero temps

Grrrr... today was my day to disappoint everyone. The teens got dropped off at 6:30 am as their dad had to work, we needed to leave the house by 7 so I could be at work at a new school at 7:30. Ivy was crying, she didn't feel well, she wanted to stay home the first half the day, but I could not guarantee a ride to school for her to take tests, and do her last speech coaching before her next tournament, an overnight from Friday to Saturday. She was then supposed to have rehearsal from 5-6:30. Dropped them off, little girls sad I could not drive them to school, Violet was getting ready for ski day. Tasha walked them to the bus on a cold morning. True got done at 2:30, I got done at 3:30 and picked him up without checking my calender. We got home and Ivy, who had said she would be done at 4:30 texted at 4 she was done. Picked her up, got in a big conversation that she was still tired and sick, and the midol this morning didn't help, so it was more sick than that. She did not want to go to rehearsal from 5-6:30, I also knew she would be late at the bus gets back at 5. Called and left a message with her director that she would not come as she felt sick. Violet dragged off the bus after a day of skiing hard. I called and told pastor she would not be coming for confirmation. I had picked up the little girls at their dad's last night after work, got off at 9, and picking up Tasha from work (late-9:20, she got off at 9), picking up True at Jefferson after a one act competition (9:40), taking True home to get his school things, as he had been in Woodbury all day, and switching True for the little girls, getting home at 10 pm. Girls to bed at 10:15 pm, super late.
Looked at the calender, True was supposed to have an appt at 4, with a therapist. Called the therapist at 5:30. He called back, we will go next week. Told True he could not take the car. Not even for an hour. Not even for a half hour.
Disappointed the director, the minister, the therapist. We are almost always there. Today we are not. It is single digit temps. I worked 13 hours yesterday. Wednesday is the only day I have all the kids all week for sure. It is always confirmation day. It is almost always at least one rehearsal. We eat a speedy dinner between the bus and confirmation to try to get homework in.
I am realizing that for the next two or three months with speech and show choir, it will be a very rare night on my weekends we can be together. Tonight I am selfish. I want my tired weary slightly sick kids to rest, eat, relax. I made chocolate chip cookie dough dip, we are gathering in the big room, talking, Capri is snuggling with True. They are having warm baths. They are shampooing hair. They are calming down. Yes, they are also watching True play a video game.
At this point, I am sad to say, I am contemplating if I want Promise to be in traditional confirmation. It will be another three years of every Wednesday during school rushing. It will start another run of ten years of confirmation. It is my only day for one more year, then I should have two when Ivy graduates. I wish Promise could go to confirmation during Sunday school.
Why is it so terrible to scale back once in a while? When the emails go out saying that rehearsal needs to be a priority, is it a priority over everything? Why is it okay to skip one activity for another, to be super scheduled and booked, but not okay to say that your young teen is really just tired and needs to stay home? Adults are admonished to stay home when sick, there are guidelines to stay home for children for illness, if we are avoiding illness and mental fatigue with a night off, can it not be as valid?
I am ready to start a scale back campaign. "Can't go anymore? Take 15 hours off. Don't go. Don't do. Don't  think too much. Come out stronger on the other side."